23 Comments
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Evalogen's avatar

I really liked how the story slowly built from an ordinary suburban afternoon into something cosmic without rushing the reveal. The ending with the feather was especially effective because it leaves just enough uncertainty about what really happened.

I'm curious did you always know the feather would be the final image of the story or did that detail come to you later while you were writing?

John Watson - Horror Author's avatar

That came in the writing process. I had no clear end in mind when I started typing.

Evalogen's avatar

Honestly, I love when stories take on a life of their own like that. It makes the ending feel even more natural

Btw i have an idea related to your fic. If you're comfortable with it would it be okay if I shared it with you in DMs?

John Watson - Horror Author's avatar

If it’s about creating art for my pieces, I am unfortunately not interested.

Kathy Dirickson's avatar

John, that was wonderful and I loved the description of the odor. Also the feather was heavenly 😍

Coffin Magazine's avatar

I didn’t expect that twist. The government gaslighting everyone is real

Katharine English's avatar

Truly inventive! I wonder if you'd thought about writing a version of this in the third person? I have my reasons. ;-)

John Watson - Horror Author's avatar

This was almost totally done on the fly without any real thought, and first person was how it came out. I rarely, if ever, write in first, so I surprised myself.

Katharine English's avatar

Impressive on-the-fly storytelling!

Jose Holder's avatar

A really enjoyable, visually descriptive short with the perfect protagonist. Thanks for the story, John.

John Watson - Horror Author's avatar

Appreciate you. Thanks for reading.

Jose Holder's avatar

Pleasure’s mine, John!

Dan Gummer's avatar

Pretty damn cool idea to write a whole story on a livestream, and one that’s so enjoyable to read too! Major kudos to you!

John Watson - Horror Author's avatar

Appreciate it. Thank you.

Alicia's avatar

This is such a great story!

Waymon Hudson's avatar

This is so good… the regular guy POV for an apocalyptic battle is so interesting and cool.

Also, I would have absolutely dove for the feather too.

Bon C's avatar

Wonderful

Marcello Iori's avatar

Well done. Not an easy thing to do. Anyway I like the Angels who leave you calm and unable to remember why aren’t obviously on your side. The feather in the jar is the only thing that didn’t get erased.