Chapter 7 - Emergence
Nate’s eyes snapped open, the smoke drifting into his nostrils acting like smelling salts. Looking out his shattered windshield, he saw the source of the smoke, which drifted up from the hood of his car, white and wispy, like a spectral figure ascending to heaven. There were also splotches of red, blue and some orange swirling around inside the vehicle, creating a kaleidoscopic effect that was somehow calming.
He tried to move, to get his seatbelt off, but the slightest shift in position sent the outside world spinning again. Nate thought about closing his eyes again, but the silhouette moving just beyond the tendrils of white smoke caught his attention. There as something familiar about the way it moved, how it so arrogantly strolled through the scene of the accident.
“Dad,” Nate said aloud.
Lester came into full view, a wide grin on his face, but there was something off that took Nate a moment to pinpoint. His father’s features were the same as he remembered, but there were chunks of something around his mouth and clinging to the 5 o’clock shadow on his chin. “You done fucked up again, boy. Ran that red light.”
Blinking away the fresh flow of blood dripping into his eyes, Nate tried to make the image disappear, but Lester drew closer, finally poking his head through the shattered glass, the smell of vomit coming off him in stomach churning waves.
“Do you hear me, shithead? YOU FUCKED UP AGAIN,” Lester roared, spit flying from his mouth. “I swear, you are no son of mine. That whore mother of yours had her legs spread for every Tom, Dick, Harry, and Larry.”
“Don’t call her a whore,” Nate said meekly, salty tears mixing with the viscous blood now coating his face.
“No? Where do you think she got the money for your precious fucking fag soccer shoes? Huh? Every dollar was a drop of someone else’s cum.”
Nate turned his head away from his raging (dead) father. The sudden movement delivered dark spots before his eyes, each of them dancing and coalescing to create a singular black hole into which Nate felt himself being sucked. As he slipped back into darkness, he heard Lester voice one more time.
“I filled her up, boy, right before she fucking killed me.”
There is a moment right before the TV comes to life where, the light and color struggles to penetrate the cold darkness of the screen. That was how it felt to Nate when his eyes fluttered open and tried to handle the blazing white light that surrounded him. “Am I dead?” he mumbled.
“He’s awake. Nurse, nurse, he’s awake.” The sound of his mother’s voice, loud at first, grew distant. He let his eyes adjust to the glare and then tried to get his bearings. It was a hospital room; the entire space was soaked in bright fluorescent light that made everything appear stark and white. Nate had never been religious, but he was beginning to believe that he was walking into the light and waiting to be judged. it was only when his mother came bursting back into the room that he was snapped out of that thought.
“Oh, thank God.” Judy fell to her knees beside the bed and grabbed Nate’s hand, placing kisses on the back of it and sobbing.
“What happened, Mom?”
“You were in a car crash, baby, but you are fine.”
The room door swung open again and a doctor stepped in, a nurse by his side, standing a little too close. “Well, well, well, the young man is back among the land of the living.”
The phrase struck Nate as odd and made him wonder if he had died and was brought back. Was that why I saw my dad? Was I going to Hell?
“I’m Doctor Brewington, Nate. Let me quickly bring you up to speed. Do you remember how you ended up in hospital?”
“I, uh, I crashed my car.”
“Good,” the doctor laughed, eliciting a giggle from the nurse who seemed to be attached at the hip to the physician. Brewington swept his salt and pepper hair back from his face with a perfectly manicured hand. “I mean good that you remember, not that you crashed. How do you feel”?”
Nate watched the doctor poke and prod him with the end of his pen and wondered why he did not feel it. “Confused mostly.”
“Does this hurt?” Brewington asked, poking once again, right by the scar on Nate’s leg.
Bracing for the impending agony, Nate frowned when he felt nothing. “I don’t feel a thing.”
The doctor frowned as he grabbed Nate’s chart from the end of the bed and scribbled something on the top sheet. “You had a rather severe blow to the head, and while we have not been able to run as many tests as we would like, initial results show signs of nerve damage around the brain and spinal column.”
“Am I paralyzed?” Nate asked, eyes wide.
“No, but we thought you might experience neuropathic pain upon waking. That would be like an unpleasant tingling sensation through your body. What you are experiencing is more akin to congenital analgesia, although this is usually caused by genetic conditions as opposed to a blow to the head or other trauma.”
“I don’t understand, doctor,” Nate said, glancing at his mother, who had a similarly confused expression on her face.
Brewington sighed. “It simply means that your ability to feel pain has been turned off for the moment, but it will likely be temporary.”
“How long, Doctor Brewington?” Judy chimed in.
“Impossible to say, really, especially until we run more tests. He could be in agony in a couple of hours or be back to normal in a few weeks.” The doctor frowned again. “This is something of a unique situation.”
Agony? Once again, Nate bristled at the insensitivity of the doctor and felt the urge to scream at the man. A knot began to form in his belly and he clenched his fists. “Maybe if you concentrated on doing your job instead of ogling the fucking bimbo by your side, I could get some real fucking answers.”
Judy’s hand flew to her mouth, the nurse flushed with embarrassment, and the doctor took a backward step as though gut punched.
Nate unclenched his fists and felt his whole body sag, as though a heavy weight had been removed from his shoulders. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that.
Clearing his throat, Brewington put the chart back in its place and straightened his pristine white lab coat. “You’ve experienced some significant trauma, so anger is not totally unexpected.” the doctor turned on his heels and headed for the door, the nurse following close behind. “Try and get some rest. I’ll check back in later.”
Judy moved to the side of the bed, the soft expression on her face replaced by something a lot less pleasant. “Why did you say that Nate? Why?”
Hanging his head in shame, Nate mumbled an apology.
“You know what you sounded like there? Like your deadbeat dad. Don’t ever let me catch you talking to anyone like that ever again.”
Nate watched his mother stride out of the room, head held hight. The place where shame should have resided suddenly seemed devoid of anything. While he knew it was wrong, Nate could not stop the smile spreading across his face. He sat up straight, glared at the door, and said, “Fucking losers.”